Today was the day that you were due to enter this world.
Today was the day that we were supposed to see your sweet face. To lock eyes with you for the first time. To learn your gender. To give you a name.
Today was the day you were supposed to take our breath away. Instead we experienced that feeling {but in completely the opposite way} in July.
Instead, today is the day we will mourn what was supposed to be. To ask those questions, of why and why not?
It's a position of such juxtaposition. There are no words for how heartbroken I am that you are not here, and will never be here, and will always carry that hole in my heart. But at the same time, I feel the sweet kicks from your brother or sister, who would not be able to be here, if you were still here. But nevertheless this does not change the pain that your death still causes and will always cause.
The world may never notice, nor will a beat be missed.
But I will never forget you. This date, just like July 14th, will always hold a special place in my heart. The love that you planted in my heart, will be a light that shines forever.
Until we meet, I love you to the moon and back.
Love,
Mama
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